"Science and technology would be used as though, like the Sabbath, they had been made for man, not (as at present and still more so in the Brave New World) as though man were to be adapted and enslaved to them." - Brave New World, Foreword by Aldous Huxley
In 2003, I take it I was about 20, my sisters and I were in Boracay (by ourselves)... and this thing called "Friendster" kept everyone from the beach and in search of an internet cafe in order to "give someone a testimonial" or at least check to see if they'd received one. I didn't have an account then. So when we got back to Manila, my sisters put up my account for me (as I was studying and going home to LB then and I didn't have the time nor the resources to bother with such things). I just had to maintain it.
Come 2007, my sisters (again) convinced me to put up a Multiply site because "it was way faster than Friendster and you can put up MORE photos and albums." So I did. My first album was of my daughter, a month after she was born.
The following year, a boy named Edo from Indonesia or Hong Kong I think, stayed in my former home to live. He told us to keep in touch via Facebook (which wasn't big here at the time) so my then-boyfriend put up an account solely to communicate with him and I said we'd just share an account, if ever.
I never bothered to put up my own. Even after we broke up and I was single and my sisters told me I could totally meet guys if I had an account.
That wasn't going to convince me this time.
Even when people were asking me to move to Tumblr so they could "follow" my blogs there, I still didn't see the point. Or the reason to exert the effort.
Twitter was never an option only because... I always have a lot to say. I don't TWEET. I TALK.
Besides, I didn't wanna meet anyone new. And in a way, I didn't mind that some of the people from my past REMAINED THERE.
Call me old-fashioned but I still find that being somewhat "unavailable" to people a tad romantic.
Or maybe I'm just really pakipot.
And look... I'm still in touch with the people who matter. I still meet up with friends who remember that my number hasn't changed since forever and invite me out. I still found a boyfriend-turned-husband ON MY OWN, without the help of a really awesome profile picture, and without him telling me he'd just "add me on Facebook" rather than get my number. And I met some really lovely people by writing nonsensically on my pink Multiply blog and about my "Mis-education" and perhaps even my re-education.
I'm only sad that I wasn't available to salvage my testimonials from my Friendster account... even if I did save the pictures. Those were real gems.
So Kit and Den... HOLLA AT YOUR GIRL!!!! HAHAHAHAHA!!! I'm a phone call away. Seriously. Android, iOS, Blackberry... lahat yan kayang ipa-ring yung telepono ko. =P
I'm a very expressive person but I'm also extremely shy. I used to write constantly on LiveJournal, then Multiply when it became the next new thing. I'd write poems and heartaches and what studying in a freezing coffee shop til 2am every single day does to your marbles. All the words would just write themselves honestly and freely and unreservedly. Especially when I'd get my heart broken. I stopped writing (and this is the dumbest thing ever) because I got burned out by the people around me - too many haters who would hang on to every word I wrote hahaha. By that I mean, law students who didn't find it appropriate to have feelings outside of cases and competition and the climb to the top. Or more like, law students who didn't think it was normal to have three boyfriends in the span of one year hahaha. I think I was just trying too hard to fit in. I realize now how bonkers I was to have wanted to be part of that circle. I read their Facebook posts and tweets now and it's like they've never been intimate with life hahaha! Every word seems so "applicable" and "befitting." Nasa 1800s ba tayo (HAHAHA)?
ReplyDeleteSa totoo lang, going through my Facebook and Twitter news feeds makes me feel like I don't know any of these people. Is this all our lives are anymore, are we just made up of our likes and shares and comments and the occasional song lyric one-liner that's supposed to make people feel it's somehow what we're feeling that way? I mean, I love reading random posts from friends and family and people who are interesting already in real life. Roni's Twitter posts on cheeseburgers and Jollibee deliveries has got me hungry many nights and made me reach for the Wendy's hotline at 3am a few times haha. But the thousand other people on my Facebook I'm sure wouldn't say hi to me in the street unless I say hi first. (But even then they'd probably be surprised - they might be like, why are we interacting, we're not logged in, hahaha.)
I should really get back to writing soon. :)
pde ba itong "i-like".... haha! i'm ur biggest fan here in multiply sis!
ReplyDeletefirst of all... 3 boyfriends in one year is a FEAT not an abominable mishap.
ReplyDeleteand (speaking of the 1800s and remembering our favorite girl who wants to live in medieval times hahahaha) at least you never went on to "chillax" at the coffee shop til 2am. =P
but i totally get you on "wanting to fit in" ---- i think all this blogging (at least on my end) was really more of a defense mechanism rather than blind and honest professing. then you don't seem so interesting anymore and it's like "Ohmygod maybe I should move to Tumblr" though I don't see how posting up posters of quotes can be more interesting or be more "befitting" of my passionate nature to explain things than me typing up a quote albeit in simple Arial (or whatever this font is) and going all out on it.
I want to be liked. =) And I'm glad you like me. Hahahahaha, if that makes any sense. That could've been my first tumblr post. =P
(Roni posts about Jollibee because she can't cook and can't open a jar of mayo on her own, hahaha! Although I hear she's been trying. =)
Di, you should write and paint and take photos and make love to life... if only to show them to your grandkids. I bet they'd want to know how much of a slut you were back in the day what with 3 boyfriends in a year and all HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
love you. =)
hahahaha sira. =P the fact that you take the time to check, sis, "like na like" na para sakin yun. =) I hope you're well there in singapore!!! (my dad wants to watch comedy cartel again, hahahaha!)
ReplyDeleteLove you too sweetie. Hahaha - 3 boyfriends in a year was heartbreaking! It was the beginning of the end with a boyfriend I'd been with for a little over a year (but it was very complicated because he kept competing with me over everything... oh yeah and I was in love with a friend... yeah maybe that was it hahahaha), then a three month relationship with a boy who I thought was the one (although looking back, it was so forgettable, like I'm not even just saying that to be cool - it really was vapid to the core - I suppose I was just so insistent on being in love again?)
ReplyDeleteAnd then one sembreak Wednesday, I went to Bali by myself, and fell in love there. Not with anyone, I just knew I would be in love. That place is just so magical. I came back after two weeks, and by the end of November in-love na in-love na sakin si Rayms HAHAHAHA!
My big ass wall murals from back in the day: http://coconutconstellation.multiply.com/journal/item/54/Solstice - I can't wait to get back to painting again... except I can't paint the walls in my new apartment. Haha.
Don't you just LOOOOOOOOVE love?! heartbreaking yes but gaaaaaah oh the sweet sweet agony of looking and longing and sighing and dreaming and believing, ugh don't you just want to BELIEVE!!!... (hahahaha that reminds me of a time i had a different name for a different "cartolina" paper my college friends and I used as a freedom wall. It would only take like two weeks to fill up one whole piece with our ramblings and doodles. I swear there was a different guy for each cartolina paper --- there were 3 --- and i'd just stare at the walls and the drawings and the names and the heart-shaped doodles, drinking coffee, smoking a cigarette and think to myself --- Man... it's like changing underwear. Hahahahaha!)
ReplyDeleteHahahaha at si Rayms lang talaga ang na-inlove eh noh? you were just an unsuspecting victim in all of this, hahahaha!
(you wanna paint me and pao's boring white wall in our room? cuz seriously, if i catch the paintzoom on HSN one. more. time. I AM TOTALLY ORDERING THAT SHIT.)